Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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You know what they say about a man with big feet! They say it's indicative of the size of his penis, although there's no scientific evidence backing this up.

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What did the electron do after losing his proton? Trough electromagnetical forces, the electron simply left it's atom, making it become a positive ion. Then, atracted by other atom's magnetical force, it joins the other atom's last vallence shell, creating a negative ion, since there are more electrons then protons in the atom in issue.

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roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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What do you say if you see a floating TV at night? Wow a floating TV. It's amazing how far technology has progressed throughout the years.

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A guy takes out his club and hits a baby seal with a fine for $50 for littering and threatens to smash the seal's favorite ceramic figurine with the club if he doesn't pay the fine. The man is a park ranger and takes littering very seriously.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

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why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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How do I want to die? From Chuck Norris killing me, that would be an honor.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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xCh3wyy is the biggest fail in the entire universe. If you head to www.youtube.com/xxch3wyyxx You will see how much he fails. Please dislike his horrible video and tell him to suck a prick.

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What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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A midget walked under a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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