What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

What s the difference between a pigeon ?

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

whats worse that being raped by a giant squirrel? being raped by two giant squirrels.

A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

WNBA

What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

What is short and yellow? Most Asians

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

What's red, black, and green all over? This is! I only wish you could see it too - the website wont let me upload a picture - but it is pretty impressive! Oh well.

Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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