Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

What does greg and Ian have in common?

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

why did the dog chase the cat? because the cat chased the dog first.

KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

A man with no face walks into a bar, another man sees this and promptly asks "Sir, why do you have no face?" The first man says nothing and walks away.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

What is blue, around 30 cm long and makes women cry? Crib death!

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

What did Helen Keller say to the leper? Buaaaaguuuhloo

Donald Trump.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

How did my grandparents survive the Holocaust? Well for starters, it helps that they weren't Jewish, they didn't live in Europe, and quite frankly, they probably would have supported Hitler because they were right wing pricks.

*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

What's the difference between a ferrari and pile of dead babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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