How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

what does a chair look like? a chair.

What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and strangled the child.

Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

Why do black guys have big dicks? God felt bad putting pubes on their head

Q: What do you call a girl with no arms or legs, is blind, has no parents, has cancer, and is dyslexic? A: Suzie

Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

joke under this line wins _________________________

What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

How do you make a baby not cry? Do not throw a brick at it. ANTI-JOKE

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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