Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse then a missed call from your dad? A missed call from your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops