What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

Fathers Day at Tyrone's house.

Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

What did michael say to sam? (pedo face) YEH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

A duck walks into a bar. In the middle of writing this joke I realized that there were already jokes like this so I stopped writing this one.

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

How many immature teenagers does it take to change a light bulb? Ya mum.

Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

Why are pills white? Cause they work.

What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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