why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

thumb_up thumb_down -13

WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

thumb_up thumb_down -13

yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you confuse a blonde? Explain the concept of time travel.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why was the black man fired from his job? Because the company was beginning to lose sales which then resulted in job cuts.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The bartender says "We don't serve time travellers here". Two time travellers walk into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops