Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

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If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

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Justin beiber..

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

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An Asian woman is driving home from work and arrives in 30 minutes, which is strange because it normally does not take that long but she left during rush hour and the traffic was very bad at the time.

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Nerve endings. Now, lets say we make that sensation of a finger down there vibrate, as your nose (not not your lower parts no no) become twenty times as sensitive, now you are just rubbing your nose right? Try not rubbing it completely off now...

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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Why did the black man purchase a gun? Because the man enjoys to go hunting in his spare time.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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Call me for a good time! 402-805-2412, I do anal!;) -Martini Wyant

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

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Women's rights.

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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a mexican guy, a jewish guy, and a priest jump off a plane they landed safely and had a great day

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Suicide is never the answer. Unless you ask me what I contemplated after I found out that my family was killed in a horrific traffic accident.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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