Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy this song doesn't rhyme penis

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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You're a frog

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

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What did the Asian man say to the African man Ching Chang Chong

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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Why wasn't the door a door? It was a jar.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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