How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT... nuff said

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

Women's rights

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

You know why Michael J. Fox makes really good milkshakes? ... because he uses the best ingredients

You know whats funny Aids

Yo mamma is so fat that she is likely to consume large amounts of food regularly.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

A blonde walks into a bar ouch

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

What did the blackman say to the whiteman???? Nothing! They both commintted suicide

how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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