people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

Why was the girl crying? She got shot in the penis

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

how do you drowned a blonde? put ankle weights on her and throw her in a river.

How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

Roses are red Violets are red I'm bleeding quite profusely I should proably go to the hospital

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

How will the world end? That information is unknown

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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