What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

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An anti-joke

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-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Wanna have sex?

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot, racist.

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What is the name of Helin Keller's street, state and pet Street: Mahhehb State: Hahgre Pet: habdsa

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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Q-What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? A-Where's my tractor?

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A hat.

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A man gets a paternity test. It's better than beating his wife senseless due to his own insecurity.

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well you can't because you are reading this

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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