WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

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What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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i like turtles

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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A ginger kid, a blonde kid and a brunette jump off a 50 foot building... All of them die apart from all of them because luckily there was a swimming pool at the bottom

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How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why did the little boy fall of his bike? He was dead.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

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how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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A man wearing a 'What Would Jesus Do' bracelet and a livestrong bracelet goes up to a blind kid and rubs his eyes and the kid can see. The kid was was not used to the bright lights and wandered into traffic, was hit by a car and killed instantly.

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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