What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a man and his son pull up out side b&q and the man says to his son run in there and get me a black n decker and the boy goes in and is standing in the power tools isle and he looks round and there is a lady standing next to him so he hit her, the woman happened to be black and 2 minutes later a security guard rushes round and says son what did u do that for and the son said my dad told me to come in and get a black n decker!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

why did the Mexican take $20, because he found it on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Screw it you write the joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:Whats evil ,not funny and on wheels A:The Holocost on wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -1

once upon a time there was a cripple little girls who lived in an orfanage were she got raped then beat .

thumb_up thumb_down -1

But officer, I did come to a full stop!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops