why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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An old man walks into a bar. It was, a metal cylinder, not unlike a short carbon rod, and not the drinking establishment he normally frequents, named O'Malley's Pub and Eatery, which was, in fact, next to the the building with the protruding metal bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

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I just flew in from Seattle, and boy is their airport difficult to navigate.

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went to mass. remembered to say with your spirit.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

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roy g biv

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Why did the Jewish population diminish in the '40s? Showers and Ovens

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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What's the best anti-pest control of all time???? The Holocaust.

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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?"i'm so turned on right now." - horny light bulb

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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dylan hodge wishes he could suck his own **** jokes thats what his mothers for

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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