Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench. The bucket.

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops