Heskey time.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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What did the girl say when she was getting raped? "Stop, you're hurting me."

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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99% of teenagers would cry if they saw justin bieber on the top of a skyscraper, about to jump. However, there is 1% who would be sitting in a lawn chair at the bottom screaming, DO A BACKFLIP!!!

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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Why did the tomato turn red? The salad pulled out a gun.

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Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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