What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Sally went to an R-Kelly concert what happend when she came out? No one because R-Kelly peed on sally and cops came in.

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Why do blondes where knickers? to keep their ankles warm

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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I saw 2 jews talking. I threw in a penny and watched them fight to the death. I did the same with 2 catholic preasts exept I threw in a baby boy

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What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

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Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm bad at poetry Potato

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Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

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whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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i hate non minorities!

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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My mom told me I was pretty, I know now that she is a liar.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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