a giraffe walks into a bakery, "can I have 101 brown loafs please?" the baker answers: "hmm I've got only 100 loafs is that ok too?" the giraffe says: "why the hell would I need a 100 loafs?!"

When you have read this, you've already read it.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

Wanna know how to confuse a blonde? No. I wanna know which way you would prefer to die.

what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

Why didn't the Mother packed her son's lunch? Because her son Timmy likes to go to the canteen

You idiot thats 9 letters

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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