why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

Your mom is so fat she wears large clothes

jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

A man penetrates another man.

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

Ready for something funny? nothing

Why did the man stop running. He was tierd

Why did the girl drop her ice cream? Because seeing as a bus was heading straight toward her, she quickly decided to sacrifice her frozen treat and dodge the oncoming vehicle in order to save her life.

Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

What did the man say when he saw his t.v. floating in the middle of the night? I must be seeing things. By logic, televisions don't float. My weary eyes must be playing tricks on me and I should probably go back to sleep.

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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