Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

What do you call a man who's being followed by 18 black guys? Dave, he's going to work and is stuck in traffic

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She is a woman ... Who is blind, deaf and mute Therefore considered a danger to herself And those around her.

What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

read me write me

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

Why did the guy go to the strip club? To look at naked people.

Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

Fine, ladies first.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs? A: Disabled.

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

women's rights

How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

No soap radio

why was the woman silent? she lost the ability to speak in a tragic boating accident in which her vocals chords were damaged thus making it incapable for her to utter anything

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...