Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

thumb_up thumb_down +3

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Kys

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

eh

thumb_up thumb_down +3

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the Pædophile arrested? He hit his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I'm HIV positive.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops