Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

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Irish sobriety

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A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Pickles are powerful

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

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What did the old man say to kid who was begging to his mommy? Shut up.

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Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

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Why is meth so addicting? Why? Hang on, i gotta go do some meth

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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rarw

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

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What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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