A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

What did the cow say to the chicken? - Muuuuhhhhhhhhh!

Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

Why did the woman pay $5,000 for a gallon of milk? She didn't. She paid $2.99.

What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

Roses are RED , Violets are BLUE , once Valentines day is Over , All ya girls is gonna go back to LOVIN' THE CREW.

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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