Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

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Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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what's gray, rectangular, and provides a good time? your mother's sex tape.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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How do you kill Glenn Campbell? Stab him with a screwdriver.

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homosexual rights to marriage

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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what do you call a Puerto Rican with no arms? Trust worthy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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