Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

hello? knock knock. you called me, why are you saying knock knock?

thumb_up thumb_down -46

what did the father say to his son whom had only one arm? hey son.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

thumb_up thumb_down -50

With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Whais red and bad for your teeth? a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +31

who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +31

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops