What do you call a chicken who crosses a road? Nothing, its still a chicken

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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Why w\s the English man, the French man, the German man, the Indian man, the Chinese man, the Irish man, the American man and the russian man all on a train together? They where going to the olympics.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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So these two girls have a cup .

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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why did justin go to maddie parris house to fuck her.....

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Why did the man stop dead in his tracks? He was on top of a land mine.

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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irish man drinking john smiths

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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