What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

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when life throws you lemons you should watch out or you might get hurt.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn the people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? cause he had mad-cow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican Cross the road? He was on His way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was walking to his car, racist....just kidding, he was on his way to rob a bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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There once was a little girl called maddie who had a very earisponaceable daddy, she was taken from her bed and now she is dead and was raped by a Portuguese tranny

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

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What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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Patient: I thonk I'm gonna die Doctor: well will ya hurry up and die already? I've got to treat a kid with a paper cut.

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What's white and sticky? Snow. What were you thinking of?

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What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

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What's brown and sticky? A Mexicans underwear.

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1st black guy: get a job 2nd black guy: i have one 1st black guy: okay

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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