Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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Poop

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What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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Why is jordan goldstein a fag cause he doesnt like my videos

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

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I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

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How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

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Whats black and white and red all over?.. The L.A. Race Riots.

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Why didn't the man laugh at his son's joke? Because he was born without a mouth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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