Roses are red,violets are blue, dont read my words, says the ring of lords.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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It's gone. It's all gone. There's nothing left.

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A squirrel is about to steal the eggs of a sparrow when the sparrow suddenly says, "Stop! I will do anything if you would spare my eggs!" The squirrel has no capacity to reason and so steals the eggs anyway. The sparrow is devastated.

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So a horse walks into a bar.. and breaks both its front legs. The owner has to shoot it because it can't race anymore

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Q: What did the man say when he tried to commit suicide by jumping off a 20 storie building? A: Ow!

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Why couldn't Jimmy's bedroom door close? Because it had a tree blocking it.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

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http://adf.ly/C8MqG

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

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What do you get when you write your own anti-joke? Herpes.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

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What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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