Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

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A casual web surfer logs onto a website and reads half a joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not intelligent enough to realize the hazardous dangers of crossing the street.

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane a pilot

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Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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An Asian walks into a Chinese restaurant. Then he decides that he would prefer Mexican instead, and drives to a Taco Bell.

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Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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Why was the women's underwear red?... Because she got stabbed.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hi i'm Steve, it's nice to meet you

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What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

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Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

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Blacks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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