How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a nice evening.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What do you do to a woman who has a black eye? Punch her in the other eye so that they match.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

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What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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what do a black guy and a white guy have in common? neither of them are purple

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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