A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

What is worse than eating shoxy poulet.? Nothing

why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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