A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the man shot in the head twice? He wasn't because he died after the first and it is nearly impossible to survive a gunshot to the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

In Soviet Russia, test takes you... to a privileged University with an appropriate transcript.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Society wants to be so prude and pure that on AntiJoke, you actually get words like P U S S Y and P E N I S censored !

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Know what's funny? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what's the worst way to fall asleep? sad. it makes you lose sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

thumb_up thumb_down -22

I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the big refrigerator fall down the cheese Because i licked my own ear and it got scared and cheese for no raiSOnsD

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's the difference between Miley Cyrus and a dead baby? One is a popular singer and the other is a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops