what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

Sarah Jessica Parker

who is not good looking? mon morello

Anne Widdecombe becomes attractive.

I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

Why was the Black man running with a T.V.? Because he had just purchased a new LCD FlatScreen from BestBuy, and a torrential downpour had just began and he didn't have a free hand to hold up his umbrella.

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Why was the man so cold? He was in a fridge

If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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