What is brown and sticky? A Stick

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How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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I have a horse.

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

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What will your friend do after you kill him? Nothing, he is dead.

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a swing set in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Q.Why was the man so fat A. because he had to much to eat

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What is the Modern Day slave trade? The nba

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear larger clothes than the average person.

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Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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five gay guys stand in a line is it a straight line

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Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

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Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

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What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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