Two men walk into a bar, get drunk, and drive home. Unfortunately, they crash into a tree and are mortally wounded.

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What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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How much seamen does a gay guy have??? A whole butt load.

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How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

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What do you get when you cross a cat with a fish? A dead fish.

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Why was the girl on the ground? She jumped off a bridge.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock (who's there?) Not Sally.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Jesus Christ how dumb can you get.

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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