ask me if i'm a tree are you a tree? No.

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Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

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What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

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Your momma so fat, she's fat

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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Why cant a black person read? Because there is nothing to read...

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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What is the difference between a bear and berries? No idea? You better stay out of the forest...

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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Aodhan, Kevin, Taggart and Caoimhin walk into a bar. They have drinks and then leave.

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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Knock Knock? Whos there? Ching Ching Who? No...Ching Smith you racist!

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"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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Q: Why did the black man call the white man a rasict? A:because he called him black.

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mikey is cute

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i'm filthy rich literally because money is dirty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops