what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Cigarettes are a lot like hamsters. Perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and catch them on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

thumb_up thumb_down -9

"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

thumb_up thumb_down -9

When life throws knives at you, run away.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between a cow and a sheep a cow goes baa and a sheep goes moo

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar. Realizing he forgot his ID, he leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Do you work at subway? Because you are giving me a footlong. Yes, please, on white bread, with turkey, ham, white cheddar, and all of the vegetables. Maybe a little bit of sweet onion sauce and sub sauce. Sure, that will be a combo with chips. Thank you very much.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red, violets are blue, if you didn't know that, go back to school.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Jimmy fall of his tractor? Because Jimmy doesn't have any arms or legs...Why doesn't Jimmy have any arms and legs? Cause Jimmy is a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The word "Walter" is never funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

thumb_up thumb_down -9

YEAH THEY DO!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops