What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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four score and seven years ago. . sharks with frickn laser beams attached to their FRICKeN HEADs.

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A boy walks into a bar. He wakes up in a hospital 3 days later with a bruise on his head. He asks the doctor, "What happened?" The doctor replies, "The bartender smashed a glass on your forehead."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

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Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

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Ill admit it Nero, although you act like a savage you make a fine statement there, maybe we will ask her to join one time huh?

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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I do u blow up a house U put dynamite in it

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What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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civil rights

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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Why? Because.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops