Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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why did the panda go to the store? to buy milk.

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How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

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What do you call a man who does not burst into tears after hearing that his mother has died? A person that has been desensitized by today's cruel world and society.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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Why's it so bad to be black and Jewish? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Why did the black guy seem so black next to a white guy? Because he had more melanin in his skin

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A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

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Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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What do you can a preschool on fire? A very dangerouse situation

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Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

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What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

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What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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Tyler is a downer and is always negative to everybody

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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Q. Wheres your nan???? A. In my closet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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