so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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What do you call a fat priest? Obese

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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I have an idea! You leave.

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How do you stop a black man from bleeding? You give him a bandaid. What if he keeps crying? Tell him to stop. What if he cries more? Buy him an ostrich.

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What's white and moves at a glacial pace? A glacier.

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

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How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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whats brown and booky a book.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'll choke you with a hose

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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roses are red violets are blue i'm chinese and i don't know a joke pickle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops