Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

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Whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom. Whats worse than a pile of dead babies with one alive at the bottom? It having to eat its way out. Whats worse than it having to eat its way out? It comes back for seconds.

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I meant to state that I threatened to kill him unless he refused to state that I broke his knees (and broke his wrists, I forgot to mention that too, such misery... ...Give a real man a chance here, its not every day I have to kill my mother... But you still wont hear me whining about it, asked my wife if she forgave me if I spent the rest of the day smirking, after all my mother "had visions" where my wife was Satan, which is fun, since I was also Satan the day I was born... Because my name is Nero... A NAME SHE GAVE ME! Still, not very dignifying getting the shit beat out that old hag because she was on some blend of angel dust, and still not so fun killing her by biting half her neck off... ...Literally not so fun, kinda fun? You bet, tasted disgusting, watching her choke to death was...Lets just say I have shared enough joy with you for one day.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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What's city is in New York New York City

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? Most likely a dead penguin.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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What do you call a 2 storied house ?

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

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Brett Favre sent me a pic of his penis. I then compared it to my own and felt good about my general ackage size

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What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

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why do the jewish guy and italian girl talk? i dont know why any decent minded italian would talk to a jew so i don't know.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

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whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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The Jewish boy asks his dad for 50 dollars His dad says " 40 dollars? what do you need 30 dollars for? "

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What is short and yellow? Most Asians

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What did I wake upto this morning that was white , cold and 2 inches deep? My tiny flaccid penis.

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Columbus Day... A day to remember the anniversary of Columbus enslaving America.

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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Your mother is so fat, that somebody should inform her of the risks of eating unhealthy foods because she could obtain life threatening diseases.

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Whats a blind catholics biggest fear? The priests power of chris compelling him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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