Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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- I got kicked out of the library today. - why? - because I put the women's rights book in the fiction section

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How did the Holocaust start? Hitler threw a penny into the oven

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

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You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

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What's green, little, and eats rocks? A Little Green Rock-Eater What's green and has a thousand wheels? A lawn, I lied about the wheels! If I were to throw a rock down the a whole in the center of the earth (straight through) what would happen? The Little Green Rock-Eater would eat it!

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Man walks into a bar and goes, "Ouch!"

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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knock knock

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A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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