wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

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Why are women such horrible drivers? Their hair gets in the way.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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how do you get your son or daughters attention? break down the door to their room and promptly begin beating them with a wooden baseball and then tie them up to a chair and torture them for 24 hours.

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What is black and blue? A pen with reversable ink.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He had no legs

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If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Do you want to hear some bad news? My wife just died Do you want to hear some good news? I'm single

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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