Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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What's the difference between a horse and a chicken? They're different species and also the chicken is female, while the horse I was referring to is male.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

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Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

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Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

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Yeah, I mean to be honest with you, I get that one a lot.

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roses are red violets are blue i just made you remember two girls one cup

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I like my women how i like my coffee. Without a penis.

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Roses were red Violets were blue Until the Fire nation attacked Now it's all black

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Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

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Knock Knock Whos there? Opportunity

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

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What did George Washington say to his men before they crossed the Delaware River? Men, to the boats.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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What happens when your first name is Newton? You get nicknamed NEWT

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What do you call a man that's not funny? An un - funny man!

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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Waffles ate my grandma

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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