What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

Why did Sally's ice cream melt? She was on fire.

Thank you Jesus, for this wonderful meal we have tonight. De nada.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

What's wet and pink and fun to watch in someone's face? A big bubble gum bubble exploding into someone's face.

Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

Why was the man so fat? Because he is in a wheel chair and can't exercise.

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

what's white and sticky semen

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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