How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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A muslim walks out of a plane.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Neither have I

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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How do you get a clown off of your property? You ask him politely to get off and if he doesn't, you should contact the authorities immediately.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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