What's black and white and read all over? Corn, I lied about everything.

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PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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What do you do when you eat a loaf of bread? You throw it up because your brother made it

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A man removed Stephen Hawkings hand off his keyboard, what did Stephen say to the man? Nothing his hand isnt on the keyboard.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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Whats a frogs favorite year? 2009!

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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why did the boy fall back wards? he was shot dead

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what is pink and shaped like a banana? A pink banana.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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Liverpool City Football Club

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist!

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

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An Aisian failed a test

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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How do you kill a blonde? You wait until she dies of old age, then copyright her death.

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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Hey, Have you Seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he!

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why did the black man drink grape kool-aid kool-aid refreshed him after a hard days work out in the field picking cotton

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops