Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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top kek

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Your mama is so ugly, when she looks in the mirror it displays her reflection like all mirrors do

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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a Dyslexic, Agnostic, Insomniac stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a dog.

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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Q: In 2900 A.D, why did the stars started blasting at each other and exploding? A: Because it was the time for "Star Wars".

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

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A priest, a rabbi and Santa walk into a bar. that's a highly coincidental situation.

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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